self employment, who knew?

self employment offers quite a few perks. 

basically, i have been self employed since i was pregnant with my first child. 

now i find myself 20 years later still enjoying this. 

or so i keep telling myself. 

i have the pleasures that we all know about that include: 

a good commute to work; 

access to refrigerator and no one stealing my yogurt, at least that i can prosecute; 

i can work in my jammies; 

i freely watch tv or movies... since listening to music is not higher on my preference list; 

and when i leave my stuff everywhere, only my family can be displeased. 

a major perk is one where i can eat leftover pizza from last night's dinner over the sink. 

there is a lot to recommend this lifestyle. 

BUT...

not really having someone to report to, is hard.

 to keep a good pace  on the act of being solidly productive is a challenge some days. 

i feel driven about most of what i am doing.

it is organizationally challenging to complete a design from concept to conclusion. 

there are many many little components that can trip me up. 

my worst one is the dread of shipping. 

now over time, i have managed to get loads of stuff out of my door. 

it just takes some frustrating runs to the stationery store and to be cohesive in my purchases. 

 redundancy is frustrating. 

i enjoy about 8 shipping tape containers now. 

since they keep on disappearing, i find myself replacing them. 

this is a pre-amble to finding the one{ i like best at that moment}, 

in a child's room. 

i hate going in their caves to find my stuff, cause i get off track. 

the filth and the clutter stymy me. 

clearing crap out becomes a highly placed to-do item on the list. 

and there i go all over again. getting way far off track. 

the self loathing revisits me, 

since by this point, the tape dispenser unit has been replaced 

AGAIN.

finding scissors. 

they are in each room to perform specific tasks. 

paper only, plastic only, fabric only, 

multitasked 

and on and on and on 

again. 

the act of reaching for the pair of orange handled ones at my right is often thwarted by 

my daughter and her midnight sorties to do some crafty homework assignment. 

i do not begrudge her the use of my tools. 

what i get cranky about is that they are rarely where  i want them

when they are needed. 

once again, a shipping issue. 

and so it goes. 

the tap dance. 

the ebb and flow 

of productivity. 

now i am off to find the completed liquid brains in a cup... aka coffee. 

no secretary is near at hand to brew up a pot or cup just for me. 

this is just sad. 

i can of course try my utmost to tackle this persnickety issue 

as soon as possible.

in the mean time, i shall continue making things.

 earrings,

 bracelets, 

necklaces,

 rings



and other goodies.
{these may or may not include dinner. }
{a big bubbling pot of minestrone!}

forcing sparkly glass cuts into centers of blooming colorful jewelry pieces that are being shared with the rest of the country. 

but not until i have that little power pack of caffeine 

sloshing around inside of me. 

every little bit helps. 

xoxo. 

W.